Born Into Art, Self Taught Anyway

Both of my parents are art majors. Not one. Both.

I am self taught. I didn't follow the rules. I wouldn't ask for advice. They were always supportive — they still are. But if you could see their work, you'd understand why walking into a room with it felt a little intimidating.

The years I spent trying to figure out my style felt like throwing spaghetti at a wall. I tried everything. I painted technically challenging portraits and usually watched the dopamine wear off well before the painting was done. Imposter syndrome has a way of doing that.

What I found instead — almost by accident — was collage. Specifically, the kind made from cutting up old paintings that didn't work out.

My collage girls have their eyes closed. That was a deliberate choice. Closed eyes take the pressure off the viewer. But here's what I didn't expect: the simplicity of the design and the childlike techniques take the pressure off me as the creator too. The entire process is woven with the same calm I'm trying to put into the work. You can't make art about stillness while you're white-knuckling a brush trying to prove something.

Will I still paint something technically challenging sometimes? Probably. But what I want to put out into the world is art that makes your inner child feel safe enough to be yourself. Art that might spark something in you to create, and so on, and so on.

My art won't be studied for impressive techniques or fancy materials. It certainly won't last the test of time. My hope is that it gives someone a moment of peace.

Sometimes that's all you need to keep going.